I missed Doctor Who last night, and that doesn't bother me

But that fact does bother me. I should be excited about a new season of Doctor Who and my wife can tell you I started it out ready to roll. I was in with the first episode. I found the Stenza villain to be weird and awkward, but over all I was in! I loved it. I looked forward to seeing where the series would go from there. Oh, SPOILER WARNING. If you haven't watched any of this season of Doctor Who with Jodie Whitaker as the Doctor (and you avoid spoilers) this is where to stop reading.

Unfortunately, the following episodes that I have seen so far, have been disjointed, awkward, and flogged with PC culture to the point of brow beating. But I will say, if it were only one of those issues, it would be forgivable.

Let's start with the Stenza. This looked to be the new big bad of the show and I hated them for their evil deeds right from the start. When tooth-face (I know that wasn't his name) told the Doctor that his people kept abducted humans as trophies in suspended animation, I thought, "Oh you just screwed the pooch, buddy. The Doctor will be coming for you and yours." When the Stenza were behind the destruction of the next planet they went to (to find the TARDIS in episode 2); it seemed this would indeed be the case.

Mentions of the Stenza in any way or form since then... ZERO. Not a nod, not a hint, not a mention. Nothing at all. Story line possibility left dangling out in the aether somewhere.

Come episode 3, to stop random bad guy from altering history (to keep "people" in their place as he was directly quoted saying). Random bad guy is not human and is from the same prison planet that barely managed to hold River Song. Random bad guy wanted to stop Rosa Parks from triggering history for black people. Why that would have any beneficial effect on random alien bad guy is never explained. Only the flimsy teaser of "little things affect bigger things" was given as his excuse. This gave me the false hope that he would one of the things revisited later on to tie everything together at the end of the season. Alas. It gets worse. One of the companions takes random bad guy's time weapon and throws random bad guy to some unchecked point in human pre-history. Because what damage could he do back there, right?

When the Doctor is told about this, she doesn't bat an a eye. It doesn't bother her in the slightest that one of her companions just did something that could irrevocably destroy history by way more than keeping Rosa Parks off a bus. And that's the last you see of any effect of random bad guy. Apparently that really did the trick because there is no change of anything at all when they get back home. Nope. Not the slightest effect tied to him unless they want to say that the giant spiders were his fault. But the whole episode turned into a history lesson of bash you over the head with American black history while going "cough cough" England didn't do segregation (actual quote of a companion). And that was it. Yes, they had to protect history, but the rest was a sham.

But wait, giant spiders! Giant spiders are cool right? When I sat down to watch this episode, I was ready. I thought, "All right! Here we go! Now we're getting on track!"   Alas again.  I'll just briefly mention the Trump mocking with the uptight billionaire business man who planned to run for American President soon and get on with it. This was not a revisit to Planet of the Spiders but felt a little like The Green Death. The giant spiders were made by some lab doing experiments on the lifespan of spiders. The failed specimens were sent to a disposal sight under Trump guy's new hotel along with chemical waste. Enter giant spider that has babies and they wind up in exactly just two people's homes. One of the companions and a woman from the lab. The rest of the spiders, for reasons unknown, never venture out of the hotel. They discovered the chemical dumping zone as a massive cavern you could fit a city in under the hotel. No one does anything about that by the way. No UNIT troops, nothing of any other intervention. There's a cavern of biological altering chemicals under London... oh well. They trick all the small spiders into a "panic room" and close them off "forever". Then they hunt down Mommy spider to find she's dying anyway because she grew too big. A fate that would have befallen all the spiders anyway. The Doctor was literally not even a necessary part of the story. And then billionaire guy shoots the spider and kills it anyway while remarking how great guns are and how everyone (like Americans) should be shooting things with them.

Next we have the Demons of Punjab. We delve into the early history of one companion's family during the time that Pakistan was created in the divide of India. This story was a total sham. The first half gives you the promise of ooooh alien assassins messing with history (like random bad guy?) but ends with, oh they weren't assassins after all, just watchers of history and there was no reason for the Doctor to be there. That's right, the only plausible threat was keeping Yaz from messing up her own family tree. The rest was a flat history lesson an nothing else. Rosa Parks was better aside from the 'bash Americans for segregation stunt'. I don't know what I was tricked into watching, but it wasn't Dr Who. Oh there was the point of the first woman to be married in Pakistan.

The Pting thing was the next episode (not the actual title). It was about the Doctor and friends getting hit by a sonic mine while searching through a planet of junk for who knows what. They are on a medical ship that takes off and leaves the TARDIS on said junk planet, causing the Dr to have panic attacks. Then comes the Pting. A tiny creature that can eat through anything and is indestructible to boot. It was the only awesome thing about the story because the entire other half was about a whiny pregnant man who didn't know if he could be a father. The Doctor did need to save the ship from the Pting, which she did in true Doctor fashion. But that was the only save. I just found whiny preggers man to be way overplayed. I started to hope that maybe this was the turning point and it would get better from here.

Bring on KERBLAM. While obviously a massive joking jab at Amazon and automated jobs, the show was better. There was still some seriously thoughtless writing however. In the beginning, one of the companions mentions how creepy the robots look (because robots!). The Doctor takes some offense and says some of her best friends were robots and uses the word 'robophobic'.  Now this line of thinking doesn't stop the Doc from having every single robot on Kerblam world commit suicide at the end, but oh well right? All because some guy re-engineered bubble wrap to kill anyone who popped it after opening a Kerblam package. So, title and all, the whole thing felt more like a parody of a Doctor Who story than an actual story.  And no, at the end, she actually did not have to have them all destroy themselves. Wasn't necessary at all. If you watch it to prove anything, make it that.

The Witchfinders again started with some promise but fell short. The show spent entirely too much time lamenting how unfair it was to be a woman during those times (being the time of the witch trials, but in England rather than the colonies). But it is historically accurate as you can see HERE.
It is only towards the end that we discover an alien race behind it all, reanimating the dead or taking over the living to be free of a prison some other alien race made out of a freaking tree. But again, it's more history lesson than story because if you read the link I give you, you get everything except two things. King James never put himself in the middle of the hunts and there were no aliens. It is absolutely about how women were the sole targets of those hunts. This episode has caused critics of the pc culturing to lose their minds. I just found it shallow and the alien thing felt like an afterthought.

I missed the current episode last night. I will be watching it out of morbid curiosity more than hoping to see a true Doctor Who storyline. I am in agreement with the critics on the points of how few shows we are getting with even less next year. None of it feels promising. Shows are not tied together enough or at all. It all feels like a mish mash of randomly sought historical examples thrown together. I've heard them say that they wanted this to be a kids show again (again?) and I can say it is reminding me of a very similar kids show. Magic Schoolbus.

Thanks for reading! I don't know where Doctor Who is headed, but if they want the TARDIS to be the next magic schoolbus, I'm afraid their going to wind up off the road and in a ditch.

GZ Legends 80: Chaos Rising

            

Stormy ran his white gloved fingers over the skull end of his cane as he spoke. “You know, Chaos Drones, Hounds, and especially Serpents are very hard to come by.”

            “If you didn’t want your toys broken, you shouldn’t have thrown them at us.” Sandstorm said as he stood stiff and clenched his fists.

            “Perhaps. Watching you struggle with them was amusing in its own right.”

            “Come out from behind your little force field and we’ll see who struggles.” Anubis growled.

            “In good time. But first, I see that we are missing a few people.” Stormy snapped his finger and Nightfall, Atomizer and Redeagle appeared near their friends. “That’s better.”

            Redeagle instantly drew his pistol.

            “Don’t shoot! There’s a barrier.” Electrode warned.

            “You obviously want to tell us about your sick plan.” Sandstorm said. “So quit wasting our time.” All the while, he applied his elemental senses to the area around him, looking for a weakness to exploit.

            “You’re all here for the final act. You were supposed to die, but that hardly matters when I get to sacrifice all of you to him.”

            “You think we’re going to let you release Chaos? That’s what this is about right?” Anubis said. “We’ve been told.”

           

“Yes. And a grand remaking of the universe will soon begin. You see, the last time he was free, he nearly killed all the gods of this universe. He nearly erased the definitions of good and evil. Insanity and beautiful madness spread like a glorious disease. Everything I’ve done, to this point, has been to upset the balance enough to free him. Oh, you look skeptical. What I did, didn’t make sense to you? That’s the beauty of it. Chaos doesn’t have to make sense. It doesn’t.  I started with a global catastrophe and blocked out the sun. Imagine the terror around the world? It triggered lawlessness, looting, and more. But then I needed some very centralized effects to gain enough weight to tip the scales of the balance. So I destroyed the greatest force of good in one of the largest cities in the world, New York. The New York Police Departments were wiped out in a single night. What a crushing blow. With them barely functioning, murder and mayhem could run rampant, as you all saw. You remember having to fight looters and Professor Zombie’s creations? The fact that you could stop them didn’t matter. They provided the death toll needed to keep this whole wheel moving forward. Of course I needed more. So I had the greatest icon of this country taken by siege. That would be the White House of course. Politicians don’t count much for cracking the balance, but he hopes of people that get downtrodden, perfect.”

            “So everything was just to do as much damage as you could, even if it didn’t succeed in destroying everything?” Electrode said.

            “Exactly. The living hurricane, the 7 artifacts, every single challenge you’ve faced so far, meant to do damage that wouldn’t otherwise be done. Whether or not it killed any of you, would merely be a bonus. You were meant to come here. You were meant to be sacrificed to Chaos.”

            “I think we’re going to surprise you.” Atomizer said before he suddenly put a hand to his forehead.

            “Your powers are triggered by mental command, Atomizer. My mystical neural net will prevent you from blowing up so much as a toothpick.” Stormy said proudly.

            “Okay, that’s it! Wait! I can’t move!” Anubis dropped his lance and stood rigid in place.

            “That’s from my gift given to you at the beach, Anubis. You assumed it was part of your armor and gifts, but you’re too new to have realized it wasn’t. My magic ring will keep you from doing anything but watch your friends die. It was so easy to slip it on your finger. You must learn to pay attention, but you won’t live to use the lesson.”

            Nyhtwulf lunged forward but collapsed to the ground, holding his ears in agony. Stormy stood up from his throne with cane in hand.

            “That horrifying pitch in your ears and brain is something only you can hear, demon. You can’t even stay intangible.” Stormy stepped down from the throne.

            Blacktide’s body suddenly engulfed in swirling shadows from his power as it overloaded and strained is ability to control. He dropped to his knees trying to hold it all in.

           

“You better hold on tight, Blacktide. You wouldn’t want to kill all your friends. That would almost be like when you killed your parents. Oh, I know, it was an accident. That’s what you tell yourself anyway.” Stormy took another step towards the remaining friends.

            “You’ll find me more difficult to deal with.” Galose said as he stepped forward.

            “I doubt it.” Stormy tossed a small device at Galose who instinctively caught it. All systems suddenly went to static. Readings weren’t working and multiple systems were starting to shut down. “That’s a little gift from the Maker. It’s designed to shut down any form of technology; even of the mighty Cyborians. Before you can override it, your armor will be dead.”

            Stormy stopped in front of Sandstorm, Electrode, Nightfall and Redeagle.

            “Well? What is the great and powerful Sandstorm going to do?”

            “At the moment? Nothing.”

            “Really? Fascinating!” Stormy shot a bolt of energy that hit Nightfall and knocked her out instantly. “Even if I start hurting your friends?”

            Redeagle attacked. His powerful swings were blocked effortlessly. Stormy spun and drove the end of his cane through the agent’s midsection. Stormy fixed his eyes on those of Sandstorm as he gave his cane a jerk and dropped Redeagle to the floor. Electrode almost moved forward, but Sandstorm put a hand on his shoulder.

            “Don’t.”

            “But…”

            “Don’t. He’s tapped into the powers of all the other people in those cylinders. They’ve amplified his abilities beyond our reach.” Sandstorm said as he held Electrode back.

            “Very intuitive, Sandstorm. You’re exactly right.”

            From the swirling abyss a great shadow formed of a hand that made them all seem like ants in comparison. Stormy smiled.

            “He’s coming.”

GZ Legends 78: Hiss from the Abyss

           

 Blacktide’s eyes clouded in dark shadows as his power grew. He clenched his fist, also shrouded in the dark energies he commanded. Shadow wisps even emitted from his lips as he spoke.

            “Now.”

            Nyhtwulf shifted out of the way and Blacktide thrust his fist forward. Despite the amount of power coursing in the effect, a disintegration bolt or wave makes little more in noise than a cough or ‘whumping’ sound. The crackling and spitting sparks all came from the Chaos drone as it took the attack full in the chest. The air sizzled from the relentless attack and the drone started to be forced backwards. Layers of armor dissipated into smoke followed by wires and circuit boards. Still, it didn’t happen as quickly as this kind of power would destroy anything common to Earth. Blacktide didn’t realize it, but this charge released on Earth would have been catastrophic in its effect.

           

The drone stumbled as the blast achieved the halfway mark into its body. Blacktide pressed advantage and stepped forward. All he knew in the moment was rage. Rage at all the horrors he and his friends had faced so far. Horrors all set in motion by the one man they sought on this nightmare path. Finally, the drone shuddered and fell backwards, floating away into the strangeness of the void around them. Blacktide stopped firing and watched for a second as the useless metal trash drifted away. He leaned over and put his hands on his knees and realized he was out of breath.

            Electrode could feel a sharp tooth press its point against the side of his neck. Even with all Sandstorm’s elemental strength and an iron ore fist in its mouth, the giant hound only needed to flinch and kill its prey. Electrode’s mind raced and desperation fueled the invention of idea. One of its red glaring eyes was close to his right hand where he had a fistful of black fur. For anyone else, the time it would take to let go and try this stunt would result in death. For a man who could move faster than the speed of light, it was perfect timing. While his body was pinned, he could still move that hand. Utilizing his speed and making the world around him stand still, he darted his hand to the creature’s eye and dug his electrical arcing fingers in hard. Its eye was the size of a racquetball and just as rubbery in consistency. He pulled with the power of his speed and ripped the eye from its socket, still attached by its long cord. Now was the time to charge it with everything he had to offer. The jolting hit home this time and the beast threw its head backwards, howling in pain. Taking advantage, Sandstorm pulled its head back and grasped upper and lower portions of its jaw. With a mighty heave in strength, he snapped its jaw outward. The beast fell over dead.

            Anubis and Galose wrestled with their giant hound. Galose activated strength adaptation programs in his armor. Because Cyborian armor keeps all its equipment and systems in pocket dimensions, it can store machinery much larger than itself. The strength adaptation and amplification systems were powered by a metron reactor twice as big as his armor. In times of need, Galose could amplify his armors strength capabilities by 50 times or more. It was a temporary surge, but usually enough to complete any task at hand.

            “I can’t budge this thing!” Anubis shouted.

            “I have something.” Galose responded. “The creature’s hide is virtually impenetrable, however…”

            He slowly pushed the creature back and jammed an arm down its throat. He extended his metron rifle and fired several times. The creature convulsed and went limp, hanging from Galose’s arm. Anubis had been knocked to the path by the creature but quickly got back to his feet.

            “Nice force feeding.” Anubis said.

            “It worked.” Galose pulled his arm from the beast’s throat and shook some disgusting green slime off.

            “You want me to clean that off of you?” Anubis asked.

            “Not necessary.” Galose’s armor cleaning programs dissipated the mess. “We are supposed to take pride in our armor’s appearance after all.”

            “Is everyone okay?” Sandstorm shouted.

            “I’m fine, now that I can keep my head.” Electrode said.

            Everyone looked to each other and many nods indicated that all would live for the time being.

            “Galose, are you getting any more readings for up ahead?” Sandstorm asked.

            “My sensors work at a limited distance in this dimension.”

            “But we can see clear down the path to where it disappears.” Anubis said.

            “That is an illusion. We cannot see precisely where the path goes. We can only follow it.”

            “I am also unable to detect anything at a distance here.” Nyhtwulf said.

            “Sounds like we’re in a twisted fog bank.” Sandstorm said. “Well, we may as well keep going. Stay close together. I don’t want us losing anyone.”

            “Oh, and don’t fly. It works really weird here.” Anubis said.

            “Yeah, we saw you go for a ride.” Blacktide said.

            “Hey, that’s no ride I want to take again.”

           

They marched forward on the path with purpose. Whatever waited for them ahead, they knew it was their mission. Clearly, they were meant to follow the path with no choices for other avenues. In a few minutes of moving forward the path rumbled and shook.

            “Tell me we aren’t going to lose the path.” Anubis said.

            “I don’t think so.” Sandstorm said. “Something is up ahead of us.”

            As they moved forward a gigantic black mass started to form ahead for the sake of vision. The path shook again from a loud growl as the new threat came into view.

            “You gotta be kidding me.” Electrode said.

            The giant black serpent’s body was wrapped around the hovering path ahead of them. Its body was as wide as a mid-size car and longer than two city buses. It raised its head with another growl and opened its mouth to show dagger long shining teeth. A light green residue dripped from its jaws as it gave them a loud warning hiss. 

GZ Legends 74: Forecast Sunny

           

 On the bridge of the Rotanian Flagship, if a robot could feel a sense of accomplishment, Mechanicore would have been glowing with it. According to all sensor readings, they had hit their target and Galose was no more. The Maker would be very pleased to learn this. At the moment, the Rotanian General’s creator dealt with the rest of the intruders in the engine bays. Mechanicore could not deny the conclusion that this should have been done long ago. The strange chain of events incited by Stormy Knight made no logical sense. According to programming, Mechanicore knew that the best way to deal with an adversary was to destroy them directly. It didn’t matter anymore. Once Stormy Knight finished whatever he was doing, the Rotanians would strip the Earth of its best mineral deposits. It was possible that Earth would even become a new Rotanian outpost. The planet would be redesigned with factories to build billions of robot soldiers.

            A bright flash interrupted mechanical musings and energy rifles blared and blasted. As Rotanians were blasted apart on all sides of the bridge, Galose came flying through the air to land a foot against Mechanicore’s head. Galose bypassed the ship’s security systems to teleport onboard. He followed up his kick with a battery of rifle and cannon blasts, pounding the robot general backwards. A well-aimed pulse grenade blew the doors away from a lift shaft. A second shot sent Mechanicore spiraling away into the darkness.

            “Now, I won’t be making the same mistake you did.” Galose said as he turned and backhanded a soldier right behind him. Its robot head went spinning across the bridge.

            Galose went straight to a console and put an armored hand on it. Interfacing with the Rotanian navigation computers took little effort. As he established commands for the ship, he scanned for his new friends. He hoped they were still alive.

            When Blacktide got pulled through the floor, Murderator tossed him down like a rag doll. The tall robot bodyguard took aim with its dark visor and a wide beam of disintegration energy came for Blacktide. He had no chance to evade and all around him, metal and machinery dissipated into smoke. As it cleared, he was amazed to find that it didn’t hurt him at all. Blacktide stared over his completely unaffected body in shock.

            “No way.”

            Murderator seemed momentarily confused by the outcome as well. Blacktide looked up at it and half smiled. He jumped to his feet as another blast came. He ignored at as he moved toward the monster robot.

            “Does not compute, huh? How about this?” Blacktide drew back one hand as he charged up his power as hard as he could. He thrust that hand forward and a bolt of darkness hit Murderator directly in the visor. Murderator convulsed, sparked and finally fell backwards. The amplified powers, a gift from Death, only needed a proper conduit past the robot’s armor.

            As if it realized its twin was beaten, Sendroid dropped through the hole, landing behind Blacktide. The blonde hero turned, his eyes were smoking black from power.

            “Oh yeah, you hunk of junk, it’s your turn.”

            Above them in the engine bay, the Maker sneered from this seat.

          

  “Defeat my bodyguards? Unheard of. None the less, you will come to me next and die. Soon my soldiers will toss your bodies into space. Your unprotected bodies will burst and that will be the end of you.”

            A rattling sound commanded the Maker’s attention from thoughts of evil. Directly below him, a piece of rock from Sandstorm’s giant body, vibrated on the floor. One by one, then two by two, each piece began to shiver and shake on the metal floor.

            “What is this?” The Maker snarled.

            A rock suddenly flew through the air and narrowly missed the Maker’s head. More followed as rocks jumped from the floor and zinged all over the chamber.

            “Impossible!” The Maker hit the control panel on his chair and the metal shields concealed him from view. Rocks pelted his chair from all sides as they spun and darted like angry hornets.

            “No matter! I will flood this chamber with radiation and deal with you!”

            But rocks penetrated the turbine engines. Metal parts broke and gears cracked. Several small explosions rocked the room. The Maker struggled to steady his chair so he could regain control of the situation. That’s when he saw Anubis on his internal monitor. The Maker’s eyes grew wide as he saw the grimacing Anubis hold back the bladed lance for throwing.

            “No.” The Maker murmured in disbelief.

            Anubis threw his lance and it drove right through the base of the hovering chair. The balance systems were destroyed by the hit and the chair spun across the engine bay. It bounced off two walls and the floor before vanishing. The Maker managed to trigger an escape teleportation system. Even so, he pounded his fists in frustration as he could not control his chair in any other way.

            After perforating the turbine engines, all the flying rocks dissipated into air followed by the reformation of Sandstorm’s body. Sandstorm rushed to Electrode’s side.

            “Come on, buddy, up and at ‘em! We have to get out of here now.” He gave his partner an electric jolt to the chest, bringing him back to consciousness.

            Nyhtwulf also woke up and dropped through the floor to get his partner and best friend. Blacktide still surged with power and both robots lay motionless.

            “No one can come near me.” Blacktide said. “It’s way too dangerous.”

            “I can come near you, my friend. We must leave now.”

            “How can we know it won’t hurt you?”

            “I have been helping you control your powers all this time. This will be no different.” Nyhtwulf said as the dark aura faded from Blacktide. “You will be alright.”

            From outside the blasts started to breach the hull. The ship navigation system kicked in with its new orders and the drive engines came to life. As the explosions continued the jump system kicked in and the ship shot across the solar system toward the sun.

GZ Legends 72: Will to Live

            

Galose materialized in the pilot’s seat of his ship. He managed to divert power to his transport systems just in time to make it look like the Rotanians scored a direct hit. Safe aboard his cloaked craft, Galose put all power into repair systems. He would not leave these heroes of Earth to fend for themselves. He had given his word.

            Anubis gazed around the room at their fallen enemies. It was time to move on. As they headed for the next door, Anubis paused by the remains of Silvercrow.

            “Wow. Blacktide, there’s something different about you.”

            “My powers seem to be a bit jacked up.”

            “I’ll say, but look.” Anubis pointed to a piece of the haunted armor that was slowly growing back, repairing itself.

            “That’s insane.” Blacktide said. “And I’ve seen a lot of insane on this trip. Let’s just get going.”

            “Sounds like we have company on the other side of this door, guys.” Nightfall said as she approached the controls.

            “I will lead our attack!” Nyhtwulf said as he flew through the door.

            “Well. Don’t let him have all the fun! Open the door!” Anubis said and Nightfall hit the controls.

            They fell on their enemy without mercy or hesitation. Nyhtwulf redirected their rifle shots back at them as Anubis charged in with his lance. Nightfall made carefully aimed attacks with her metron rifle. Blacktide raised a hand in the moments that the fight lasted and paused. He turned his hand to gaze at his palm and then back at the scene before him. He folded his fingers into a fist as the battle ended. Robot parts scattered across the corridor and smoke wafted on the air.

            “Are you alright?” Nyhtwulf asked his partner.

            “Yeah. You know, you guys had this one. I just didn’t want to graze either of you by accident. I don’t know how strong I am right now.”

            “It’s okay. If you want, you can attack first next time.” Anubis offered.

           

“Yeah, maybe that would be good.” Blacktide half chuckled but he was deeply concerned. His powers had killed people he loved and now they were stronger than he ever knew. He followed his friends down the corridor, deciding it best to watch their backs. At least any attacks from the rear wouldn’t be complicated by friends in the way.

            In another part of the ship, a crew of Rotanians were charging along another corridor until all their heads exploded. As he stepped carefully through the burning parts, Atomizer had a scowl that could scare a U.S. Marine. Redeagle covered him from the back because nothing was standing in their way up ahead. After nearly being asphyxiated, Atomizer lost all restraint in dealing with stupid robots.

            A strange feeling made the hair on the backs of their necks stand up as a different kind of Rotanian materialized in front of Atomizer. It punched him in the face so fast there was no time to react. Atomizer’s feet flew out from under him and his hat sailed into the air. He landed on his back with a loud thud. Redeagle immediately fired his weapon, but the robot slid past each shot with moves like a martial arts Grandmaster. It kicked the weapon from his hands and then launched a spin kick to his chest. Redeagle flew backwards on top of the leftovers from the squad they had just defeated.

            As Atomizer stood up, a metal backhand tossed him against the wall. He landed on his face. As he struggled to stand, his vision blurred. He could see fuzzy red dots on the floor and realized he was bleeding. Then the atrocity spoke to him.

            “I am Starhunter 613. My instructions are to beat you to death for your offense to the Maker.”

            “You’re getting ahead of yourself!” Redeagle called as he threw a broken robot head at the Starhunter. It deflected with a forearm block.

            Redeagle didn’t have time to grab up his weapon before it was upon him. The 7 foot hero instinctively relied on his own martial training with attempts to block and attack. The Starhunter was fast. It punched him across the face four times before he could react and shoved him backward on top of smoking robot parts. Then it kicked him further down the corridor away from Atomizer.

            “Your flesh is no match for Rotanian metal.” The Starhunter loomed over Redeagle, lifting a foot to stomp downward at him.

           

The wall near the robot’s head exploded and jarred it slightly to one side. Redeagle saw this as his one chance to get a hit in. With a savage battle cry, the big man lunged forward and drove his fist clear through the Starhunter’s midsection. The machine stood stunned momentarily as Redeagle pulled his arm out. He jumped up and grabbed the robot by the head and whipped its body into and opposite wall. When it hit the ground, Redeagle jumped and brought down both feet on the Starhunter’s head.

            “You want a head stomped? You like that?” He shouted as he stomped on it over and over again, smashing the metal flat against the floor. The rest of the robot body convulsed uselessly.

            “Partner.” Atomizer croaked the word and interrupted the stomp-fest. He leaned against the wall, bleeding and in severe pain. “I think it broke a couple ribs.”

            Redeagle grabbed up the metron rifle from the floor and ran to his partner.

            “I got ya. Come on, we’ll make it. Just lean on me.” Redeagle kept watch as he helped his injured friend walk.

           

Now that he could breathe, the fastest member of the team, made short work of reaching the engine rooms. Electrode marveled at the sight of the giant turbines that powered the huge Rotanian flagship. Strangely, there were no Rotanian soldiers in the massive chamber. That immediately put him on edge. He was fifty yards away from the first two turbines. Fifty yards wasn’t even a sneeze’s distance for him, but something instinctive made him pause. Three figures materialized between him and the machinery.

            The great mechanical chair of the Maker hovered a few feet from the floor. A 10 foot tall red robot stood on either side of the chair, twins. Their single optics were oozing with black energy a lot like Blacktide’s.

            “You made it. Too bad for you.” The Maker snarled. “Now you die.”

GZ Legends 70: Fight for Your Life!

           

 “Maybe I’ll have to settle for launching you into space!” Anubis retorted as he charged at Monolith.

            His attack was intercepted by the acrobatic Serpent. “Try me on for size!” The Dwarven villain hissed with his forked tongue flickering.

            Anubis blocked one of the attacker’s swords with his bladed lance and narrowly dodged the other across the top of his nose. As light flashed off the shining sword, Anubis saw one of Serpent’s death snakes emerging from a sleeve. As Serpent landed, his snakes suddenly completely withdrew into the clothing of their master.

            “Eh? What’s this? Come out and attack.” Serpent said.

            “I guess they don’t like me.” Anubis said as he moved to hit Serpent in the face.

            “Anubis, look out!” Nightfall called.

            Monolith backhanded Anubis and launched him back across the room. Silvercrow rushed in on the Egyptian hero, aiming to strike before he could get back on his feet.

            “No matter. I’m sure they’ll love a bite of your girlfriend!” Serpent called as he leapt into a deadly bladed cartwheel toward his new target.

            “I’m not such an easy target either!” Nightfall rushed to keep distance and fire her weapon. She already knew that the rifle would be useless against Monolith or Silvercrow. She prayed Anubis could handle them both. As it were, Serpent was moving in faster than she could evade.

            In another area, Redeagle and Atomizer engaged another Rotanian squad. Hot beams of energy showered sparks all over the two men as they did their best to fight back. Atomizer could still make short work of them, but numbers made progress slow. As they moved past the fallen robots, Atomizer kicked one of their heads down the hall. He then proceeded to comically dance holding his foot.

            “You really should have known.” Redeagle said with a chuckle.

            “I have boots on.”

            “Then you need to learn how to kick. I still can’t believe you did that.”

            “Oh let’s just find the next group.” Atomizer limped slightly down the hall.

            Up ahead of them a door slid open. Redeagle aimed his metron rifle as a man stepped into view. Before Redeagle could pull the trigger, he froze. So did Atomizer.

            “That will be quite enough out of the two of you.” Hypnotist said as he adjusted a cuff link. “Now what shall I have you do to each other? In a few moments it won’t matter anyway.”

            Hypnotist put a strange device in his mouth and stood staring at the two men, keeping their minds under his control.

            Galose hurried down his corridor, wishing he could track enough inside the ship to teleport. It would make everything so much easier. A door suddenly opened and Galose scanned it just as he was attacked from the side. Even with the most sophisticated technology in the universe, anyone can be distracted. Galose cursed himself for not paying attention as he barely dodged the long sharp drill aimed at his head. Mechanicore’s drill pierced the metal wall like butter. As he pulled back, the Rotanian General kicked Galose through the open door.

           

The control room he landed in had four Rotanian soldiers in it. After tumbling across the floor, Galose came up firing and made short work of all four of them. Mechanicore followed with both of his combat drills fully extended from the forearms. As the robot swung them, it evaded Galose’s shots. Mechanicore moved into close combat quickly, forcing Galose to take evasive measures. Near misses with the drills annihilated computer benches and equipment as easily as Galose’s weaponry.

            Two hits against Galose’s chest in an X pattern threw him against a wall. Mechanicore’s optic lights that move back and forth opposite of each other suddenly stopped in alignment. They glowed bright red before a wide beam of power smashed Galose through the wall. As Galose rushed to his feet, another hit from a drill split his optic visor, leaving him half blinded. From deep inside the dimensions of the armor, Galose’s view screens flickered and threatened to go black. A kick tossed the Cyborian across the next room. Sensor’s indicated other Rotanians around them, but none of them attacked. Apparently, Mechanicore wanted this target for itself.

            Galose fired but only grazed his target as a new attack came. Mechanicore gouged at him mercilessly and threw him onto a platform.

            “Goodbye, Cyborian.” With a flicker the platform activated and Galose vanished.

            The Cyborian found himself tumbling through space away from the Rotanian flagship.

            Mechanicore opened communications with the bridge. “As soon as you lock on target, open fire.

            Electrode paused by a far door and looked back at the destruction he and his partner caused. Sandstorm was still in air form, but ready for the next section they would ransack. As Electrode reached for the door controls, he suddenly tried to gasp. For every breath he tried to take, his lungs went into a panic. Nothing was there. He spun, looking for his partner or anything he could grab onto. Finding nothing, he fell to his knees. The voice of the Engineer crackled to live over a com system.

            “Did you really think I wouldn’t be prepared for your pitiful assault on my ship? Did you think I wouldn’t know you were coming? My intellect is beyond anything you could hope to understand but I think this should be a lesson learned easily enough. You have boarded a ship controlled entirely by robots. So why would robots need life support? Answer; they don’t and neither do I.”

            “Now put down your lance, Dog Boy.” Serpent said to Anubis.

            Nightfall was on the floor, clutching at her throat. Serpent stood over her with a sadistic grin. Two of his Deathsnakes were slowly moving toward her from Serpent’s sleeves.

           

Anubis’s mind spun too fast to realize the lack of oxygen wasn’t affecting him. He honestly had no idea what to do in the face of this issue. He thought of his special attack and wondered if it would tear the whole ship apart and kill all his friends anyway. He couldn’t take his eyes from Nightfall. After all they had been through, he feared this was it.

GZ Legends 63: Robot Assault!

Galose grabbed the Claymore sword protruding from his chest and pulled it out. Thanks to the fact that his actual body resided in another dimension, he was never touched by it. Only his armor suffered damage and that was quickly under repair. Galose had been hitting Silver Crow with everything he could think of without leveling the White House. The room they fought in was a shambles. Walls were broken in, furniture destroyed and a chandelier had gone out a window. Silver Crow, the haunted armor continued with the eerie echoing laugh and Galose was fed up with it.

            “Let me give you something to laugh about.” Galose said as he spun the blade of the sword in his armored hand.

            He and the haunted armor clashed as they had several times, but this time, Galose grabbed the helmet of Silver Crow and pulled it to him. In a fluid motion, he flipped the visor open and jammed the blade of the sword into the opening and far down into the armor itself.

            Silver Crow abruptly stopped laughing and staggered backward. He clutched at the hilt of his sword that stuck out from the opening of his helmet. Galose had wedged it in very well. It couldn’t be removed from an angle Silver Crow could reach.

            “Too bad you don’t have an actual throat to shove it down, but that will do.” Galose said.

            Silver Crow vanished and Galose detected the use of teleportation for the haunted armor’s escape.  At that moment Sandstorm appeared.

            “Wow. What happened here?” Sandstorm asked.

            Galose turned to him. “He bit off more than he could chew.”

            “Fair enough. Let’s find the President.”

            “Hey, guys!” Anubis called as he ran into their area. Blacktide, Nyhtwulf and Electrode also arrived. All of them had been heading for the loudest sounds of fighting.

            In the Oval Office, the Bagman had just released the President and family from his mystical bag of holding.

            “My business here is finished, Mr. President, but I dare say, the horror is far from over. I just need you here on your knees between me and that door for a few more seconds. Then I’ll let you go.”

            “Please just let my family go.” The President said.

            “Oh of course. I’m not going to hurt one hair on their heads or yours either. Now, the folks about to arrive? They  may need convincing.”

            “What are you talking about?”

           

The doors burst open and Sandstorm came in followed by the others. They all stopped as Bagman kept his hands on the President’s shoulders.

            “You’re all alone.” Sandstorm said. “It’s over and we want words with you.”

            “I’m never alone, it’s far from over, and you don’t have time for words with me.” Bagman gave an un-nerving smile and disappeared.

            “That’s really going to tick me off soon.” Sandstorm said.

            “Who are you people?” The President asked as Electrode helped him to his feet.

            “We’re PAC, the Parahuman Activity Commission. I’d point out that we’re here to help you, but that should be obvious. Are all of you alright?”

            “We aren’t hurt, but that man said someone else is coming.”

            “He’s right.” Galose said. “We have multiple incoming outside. We need to get out there now.” As if on cue, explosions could be heard outside. The ground shook with multiple impacts.

            “Mr. President, please take your family somewhere safe.” Sandstorm said before he dissipated into air.

            “Don’t worry, Mr. President, we’ll take care of it!” Anubis called as he followed his friends out of the room.

            The President was left standing in awe and wonder at what happened. His wife had to snap him out of it with a poke to the shoulder.

            Galose raced down a hall toward a window and jumped through it. As his armored form passed through the cascade of shattered glass and wood, weapon systems were already locking on targets all around him. As he landed on his feet, he started firing without hesitation. The newcomers were sleek and black in their armor. Their helmets were shaped like those of ancient Samurai and their silver face places were shiny and featureless. Their weapons spit energy blasts far more powerful than any laser on Earth.

            “What the heck are these things?” Anubis said as he and Nightfall stopped at the broken window.

            “Rotanian soldiers. They’re robots so don’t hold back!” Nightfall fired her blaster from the window a few times as she spoke.

            “My kind of fight!” Anubis flew out the window with his lance glowing. He landed in a group of the Rotanians and swung his lance in several directions. He broke two robot heads, but one of the others hit him. Anubis was knocked sprawling. “I shouldn’t underestimate you guys, should I?”

            Lightning flew in several directions as Electrode raced between the dozens of Rotanians that were attacking human soldiers. The weapons of humans were no match for Rotanian armor. Military forces were taking heavy casualties.

            “Let’s get their attention on us!” Sandstorm shouted as he combined himself with the ground. He rose as a giant of dirt and rock, scooping up several robots and smashing them together in giant hands.

            “I will get them to shoot at me while you shoot at them from cover.” Nyhtwulf suggested to his partner.

            “Go get ‘em.” Blacktide agreed.

            Nyhtwulf didn’t have to try very hard to make himself a target. Many of them opened fire on him. Thanks to his ability to redirect energy through his intangible body, the shots all went to new targets. Before Rotanian learning programs could adjust, Nyhtwulf took out 15 of them with their own weapons.  Blacktide took cover and disintegrated any that came near.

           

On the other side of the fence, Redeagle and Atomizer did their best to defend the troops. Redeagle fired until he ran out of ammunition for his .454 Casull revolver. When a blast broke the barrel off a nearby tank, Redeagle snatched it up. With little protection from their weapons, Redeagle charged into the robots, swinging the tank barrel like a giant baseball bat.

            Atomizer found himself in a quandary. There were so many high tech alien weapons, that he dared not use his power on them. The near disaster he caused with one accidently still haunted him. He blew the ground from under their feet and threw some into the air. Suddenly a Rotanian was right in front of him, its rifle aimed directly at his face.

GZ Legends 62: Holding the Fort

           

 Some moments earlier Hypnotist had just commanded Electrode to go and kill soldiers around the White House property. Before the command could fully sink in, a gust of wind threw Hypnotist over a desk and against a wall, knocking him unconscious. Sandstorm formed his body out of the air as Electrode shook off the effect.

            “We’re not having you mind controlled again if I can help it.” Sandstorm said.

            The two men walked over to Hypnotist’s body and before their eyes, he shimmered and vanished.

            “Teleportation!” Scott said. “That’s cheap.”

            “Must be their escape route.” Sandstorm said. “Well, never mind that. Let’s find everyone else who’s holed up in here.

            A loud thump came from behind a pair of double doors. Sandstorm walked over to the doors slowly, scrutinizing them up and down. From past experience he learned to expect traps of all sorts. It didn’t appear there were any wires or switches around the frame or between the doors. He looked over to Electrode who nodded to signal readiness. Sandstorm reached out and put his hand on the doorknob. After a second, he turned the knob and yanked the door open. The group of service people inside the small room practically fell over each other backwards in terror.

            “Whoa. Easy, folks. We aren’t going to hurt you. We’re here to help.”

            “That guy put us in here.” Said a young man in a janitor’s uniform. “He said, if we came out, he’d make us strangle each other.”

            “He’s gone.” Electrode offered. “You’ll be safe now.”

            “You should still stay here.” Sandstorm said sternly. “There’s fighting going on and we don’t want you to get hurt. Someone will come for you when it’s all clear.”

            “We should go see who we can help.” Electrode said.

            Sandstorm nodded and regarded the small crew of people one more time. “Are any of you hurt?”

            No one was injured. Sandstorm and Electrode left the room to head for the sounds of combat echoing through the building.

            Out on the back property, Serpent stood over Blacktide. He had a sword blade in the ground on either side of the hero’s neck. The shadowy Death snakes shifted anxiously around Serpent’s wrists, neck and just under his coat.

            “Maybe I should just let my pets have you? I know they love the taste of human life.” Serpent smiled exposing fangs and his forked tongue.

            Blacktide looked over to his right hand and felt an odd sensation course through him. He rubbed his fingers across his palm and looked up to his opponent with a smile.

            “A smile? What are you smiling for, boy?”

           

Suddenly Serpent’s body was yanked into the air with a cry of surprise. Nyhtwulf threw the murderous dwarf into the branches of the fallen tree. Blacktide jumped up and followed that with a direct blast of disintegration power. Serpent rolled clear, but with smoke curling off  his body.

            “Impossible! Nothing survives the bite of my pets!”

            Nyhtwulf flew past Serpent and slapped him to the ground on the way.

            “I was a servant to Death himself. For my service I carry his blessing. Your pets will never harm me again. I am now immune!” Nyhtwulf landed on the other side of Serpent and growled showing his own assortment of sharp teeth. While facing Nyhtwulf, Serpent didn’t see Blacktide move into position. A blast of heat caught the small monster in the back. Serpent fell to one knee with a scream of pain, lashed out at Nyhtwulf with a sword and then disappeared.

            Nyhtwulf stood unhurt as he was intangible when the sword was swung at him. He looked to his partner. “He was teleported away.”

            “Coward.” Blacktide said. “Guess we win that one after all. I thought you were gone.”

            “They only stunned me. It won’t happen again.”

            “Is everyone okay here?” Electrode said as he sped into the area.

            “Nice of you to join us.” Blacktide said with mock disdain.

            “What?” Electrode held his hands up in surprise.

            “Could have used you about 3 minutes ago.”

            “But I was…”

            “Save it. We got work to do.”

            “Hey!”

            Nyhtwulf patted Electrode on the shoulder. “He is joking.”

            “Joking? He doesn’t sound like he’s joking.”

            Blacktide turned and shrugged. “Maybe you’re just slowing down.”

            “I am not slowing down! I’ll have you know I can get us Chinese food fresh from China in 3 seconds flat! Hey, don’t walk away!”

            Blacktide walked into the building with a wry smile. Maybe there was more to this team gig after all.

            Far out in front of the White House property, Redeagle and Atomizer stood with soldiers, watching the showdown from a distance.

            “I hate sitting on the bench.” Atomizer grimaced.

            “Sandstorm said they may have backup waiting to move in. It’s our job to intercept that. If not, we lead the troops in on the signal.”

            “Benched.”

            “Look. We aren’t benched; but I know how you feel. I’m 7 feet tall, strong enough to toss a truck. I can shoot the head off a cockroach at 50 yards with ridiculous ease. Even with that, I just don’t compare to the kind of power on the rest of our team. Even with you, I’m not that powerful.”

           

“Are you kidding? I would never want to get in a fight with you. I’ve seen you lay out 10 or 15 guys without getting a scratch. You put a bullet in a speeding car’s carburetor by calculating where it was going to be when you fired. You could probably shoot Electrode. Compared to you, all I do is blow stuff up. Although I can level a building if I want to.”

            “Yeah, but what could we possibly do out here?” Redeagle gestured at the vast grounds of the Nation’s Capitol.

            “Plenty! You can shoot anything that moves because you see in the dark better than anyone. I have lots of room to cut loose with explosions to toss bad guys all over the place and… uh wait a second.”

            “Starting to see why we’re out here now?”

            “I hate it when you do that.” 

GZ Legends 61: Fight for the Capitol

           

 Silvercrow swung his Claymore sword for Galose’s head. Galose grabbed an arm with martial skill and threw the haunted armor across the room. Its landing destroyed an ornate sofa and cracked a wall. Silvercrow quickly got back on his feet, eerie laughter still echoed from within an empty helmet.

            “You remind me of someone much larger than you.” Galose said as he fired his optic cutting laser. The beam of red light hit Silvercrow across the chest without leaving a mark. Galose extended a metron cannon from his left shoulder and fired it several times. Bright explosive orbs of light blew furniture in all directions.  The explosions forced Silvercrow through the wall and buried it in smoking rubble.

            “Now maybe I can scan you for weaknesses before you get out of there.” Galose said.

            Silvercrow stood up, shrugging off the pile of debris with ease. Before Galose could respond, it charged him. Silvercrow moved with speed and agility that belied his appearance completely. No knight of olde could ever have moved so well in such armor. Galose shifted his weight and turned his body with the incoming attack. As he turned the tip of the sword etched a small line just above Galose’s red optic sensor, casting sparks as it went. His shoulder cannon locked on target and fired, tossing Silvercrow another direction across the wide room.

           

“Need to get that sword out of your hand.” Galose set his targeting systems on the right hand of Silvercrow and fired with three weapons. The blasts threw the long Claymore from Silvercrow’s hand and sent it spinning across the room.

            “That didn’t go as expected.” Galose said as he viewed half the sword emerged from his chest. Sending it spinning across the room had sent it right to him. He quickly checked system damage reports. “No critical damage. At least you don’t have it. Maybe now I can deal with you.”

            Outside, behind the White House, Blacktide stared down the Serpent with mounting rage. The ground around his feet and up to five feet away smoldered and burned. Grass shriveled and turned black. The smell of scorched landscaping drifted around them on the air.

            “Well, boy? I don’t have all day.” Serpent shifted his weight and gripped his two short swords. “Show me already!”

            Blacktide moved his fists back slightly and lunged them forward. The wave of shadowy force raced at his target, carving a trench across the ground as it went. Serpent spun one of his swords in flashes of silver. The wave went around Serpent like a river around a great stone, missing him completely. As the attack dispersed, Blacktide found Serpent leaping at him through the air. Both swords were aimed to skewer and the shadowy forms of the death snakes could be seen ready to strike. Blacktide threw himself backward frantically and the swords sliced his leather jacket as Serpent landed. Blacktide tumbled across the ground, struggling to stay away from the sharp blades. Serpent swung again and again with gleaming arcs of swift death.

           

Blacktide lashed out and disintegrated a deep patch of ground in his enemy’s path, hoping to trip him up. Serpent laughed and caught himself with one of his sword tips into the ground to propel him across. He followed that up with a cartwheel and flip into the air. Blacktide had to stay low as the blade cut through the shoulder of his jacket just enough to scratch the surface of his skin. Blacktide tumbled sideways and into the trunk of a small tree. Serpent slashed with both blades and the tree fell. Both of them had to roll out of the way. Serpent cartwheeled out across the lawn as Blacktide rolled another direction, throwing disintegration beams as he went.

            “I’m going to burn your arms and legs off!” Blacktide yelled. “Then I’m taking your head!”

            Serpent turned his cartwheel to move towards his opponent. “Oooh, such rage! I love it!”

            Blacktide fell flat on his back and found the Serpent falling toward him. There was nowhere to dodge this time. He could see the red eyes of the death snakes in the darkness and lamplight shined off deadly swords.

            In the front of the building, Monolith, the Stone Demon reached out for Nightfall’s head as she calmly lifted her blaster toward his face.

            “You’ve already seen that won’t hurt me, girlie.” The demon smiled with shining fangs.

            “It doesn’t have to.” She hit the trigger of her blaster and shot Monolith between his green glowing eyes.

            “AAAARRRR!” Monolith howled and covered his eyes from the bright flash of the blaster’s point blank shot.

            “Still sucks to get flashed in the eyes doesn’t it?” Nightfall said.

            Monolith turned away to shake off the effects of the floating dots in his eyes. His vision cleared to reveal Anubis. The Egyptian hero placed the blades of his lance under Monolith’s jaw. Anubis applied leverage and threw Monolith into the air like using a pitchfork on a bale of hay.

            “Oh, I’m going to kill you both good now!” Monolith growled as he stood up.

           

“You know, you shouldn’t fight on an empty stomach. Here, have a snack!” Anubis blasted cosmic energy into the ground between them, spraying Monolith with dirt and grass.

            While Monolith sputtered and spat from a mouthful of Earth and wiped at his eyes, Anubis flew into the dark sky.

            “Stupid dog!” Monolith yelled. He shook the dirt off his face just in time for a view of Nightfall and her blaster. Monolith howled even louder from the second blaster shot into his face.

            “How about stupid statue man?” Anubis flew into the demon’s lower back and propelled him into the air. “I have a special idea for you.”

            Using his lance across Monolith’s back, Anubis pushed him high into the air and away from the White House.

            “I’m going to shred you to pieces!” Monolith shouted into the wind as they flew.

            “You know, you’re awfully hot tempered. You need some time to cool off.” Anubis stopped flying abruptly and watched Monolith fall away to the blackness below.

            “AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaa!” Monolith could be heard until a loud splash interrupted him. Anubis had flown him two miles out over the North Atlantic Ocean.

            “Can’t fly eh? Gee that’s too bad.” Anubis mused. “Well, back to the White House!”