“Your gun going poltergeist on my
bar was hard to believe. Try me.”
“I’m not from here.”
“I kind of gathered that, Hon.
Unless you mean from another planet, that is.”
“No, not another planet. Listen,
the last thing I remember was fighting in battle against the troops of Colonel
Amon LeFey. There was a flash of light and I found myself here.”
“Are you trying to tell me you were
in the real Civil War?”
“Yes. It was April 15, 1863. You
speak as if the war was a very long time ago. How long?”
“It’s 2012.”
“The year?”
“Well, yes! How do you think you
got here exactly?”
“Le Fey is a sorcerer. I’m afraid
this is where my story becomes even harder to believe. Unfortunately, I don’t
have much time. LeFey is sure to be here somewhere too. I have to find him. He
has Excalibur.”
Vicky fell against the bar in wonder
of the story. “Wait a minute. Excalibur wasn’t in the Civil War. Wasn’t that
from the story of King Arthur or something?”
“We, descendants of the Knights of
the Round Table, have been protecting the sword for generations. Under my
Grandfather’s watch, the sword was taken. We have been pursuing it ever since.”
“So, you almost got to it and wound
up here?” Vicky said it slowly as she tried to piece it together.
“I know. It’s impossible to
believe.”
“Honey, you don’t know what kind of
a world we live in now. I’ll get my things so we can get out of here.”
“I don’t understand. Really, if you
could just tell me what direction my pistol was aiming, I’ll take my leave.”
“It was pointing South, but you’ll
never make it dressed like that.” Vicky grabbed Percival by the arm and led him
to the back door. Just before she opened
it, he pulled away.
“Le Fey is dangerous.”
“Hon, I’ve been waiting for
something exciting to happen around here for far too long. Besides, you’re
alone here. You need someone to help you. Now let’s get going!”
Seeing the argument as futile,
Percival followed Vicky to the parking lot. She led him to the side of a dusty
blue, two door car. Percival hesitated a few feet away.
“What’s wrong?” Vicky asked.
“A larger one of these tried to
kill me today.”
“Oh, you were probably in front of
it.”
“It’s like a bull?”
“No. It’s a car. We get inside of
it and ride around places. It won’t attack you and they don’t move by
themselves.”
Percival stepped closer and peered
in the window.
“Amazing.”
Vicky opened the door for him. “You
should try sitting in it.”
Percival climbed in and Vicky
closed the door. As she walked around to the driver’s side, Percival was lost
in wonder. He ran his fingers over the aged and cracked interior of her car. He
tapped his fingers on the window and shifted back and forth in the seat. He had
never experienced saddles like chairs before.
Vicky climbed in and pulled her
keys out of her purse. She put the key to the ignition and paused in thought.
“Okay, this is going to make some
noise. It won’t hurt us, I promise you.”
Even with her warning, the sudden
roar of the engine made Percival jump. He reached out to the dashboard again
and felt the tremble of the machine running. Vicky put the car in gear and
slowly drove in order to avoid shocking him too much. Percival was in awe.
“Are there still horses?” Percival
asked after a moment.
“Oh sure. People have them out in
country. They don’t bring them into towns much anymore.”
“Ah. Well, I’m glad to hear there
are still horses.”
Vicky could tell Percival missed
what he knew as home. She changed the subject.
“So, your gun points toward the
sword?”
“Yes. Since it pointed south, I
will need to head that direction immediately.”
“You can’t just go stomping around
south of here. That’s all Atchafalaya Basin out there. It’s all alligators and
snakes.”
“Do you have a better suggestion?”
“I have an idea, but we’ll have to
wait until morning.”
“Why?”
“Because that’s when the museum
opens. Besides, we need to get you into different clothes. You attract way too
much attention like that.”
After a few more minutes, Vicky
stopped the car in front of a small house with a white wire fence across the
front yard.
“It’s not much, but it’s home.”
Vicky said. She led Percival inside quickly with concern for nosy neighbors.
“Come on, Soldier, let’s get you inside.”
Percival took three steps into the
little house and stood staring. Vicki’s home was not luxurious by any means. It
was quite plain, but Percival had never seen the like of it. The cushioned
furniture, ceiling fans, and even the style of the walls were alien. Vicki
disappeared into another room as Percival ran his hands across the cushions of
the sofa. He pressed down on them, marveling at how soft they were. Vicki came
out, saw him and shook her head.
“It’s like you were just born or
something.” She took his arm and led him to the bathroom. She put some clothes
in his hands. “They didn’t have plumbing
in your time, I’m sure. I’ll show you how to work the shower, but you undress
on your own.”
Percival stood in the shower for a
long time, letting the water cascade over him. He knew Vicki was right. This
world was so far beyond him in all its wonders. He worried he may never catch
up. The sights of the day spun with chaos in his mind. The soothing shower did
little to ease the troublesome thoughts.
Percival came out of the bathroom
in a black ‘rock and roll’ t-shirt, blue jeans and white socks. Yet another
amazing advancement of the future; comfortable clothing, put his stiff wool
uniform to shame. Percival sat down on the sofa and gazed around the room some
more.
“Your time is so incredible,” he
said.
“Oh no. I have incredible right
here.” Vicki held up the television remote control.
When the screen flickered to life,
Percival completely lost his breath. He stared wide eyed at the talking box
with moving pictures. Vicki didn’t want to say so, but she enjoyed showing him
the technologies of the age, just to see the look on his face. Percival watched
late into the night until he passed out from fatigue.
When the morning sun shined on his
face through the window, Percival sat bolt upright. A quick glance of his
surroundings told him it was not a dream.
“Hey, you’re awake,” Vicki said,
walking in with a plate of sausage and eggs. “After you eat we can get going.
The museum is open.”
“How long have I slept?”
“It’s almost noon. I bundled up
your sword and gun in the trunk of the car and I sprayed your boots. Those
things stunk to high Heaven.”
Percival sniffed at the boots as he
chewed a mouthful of food. “There is perfume in my boots?”
“Not exactly,” Vicki said. “Don’t
worry, no one will notice.”
After swallowing his breakfast
nearly whole, Percival pulled on his boots so they could leave. Vicki watched
with interest but had to intervene.
“Don’t tuck your pants into the
boots, Hon. People don’t do that anymore.”
“Oh. Well, alright.” Percival stood
up and looked over himself. “Will I fit in?”
“Well enough. Let’s go.”
